I See My World In Books

http-::www.360solutions.com:blog:wp-content:uploads:2012:07:booksI’ve been a reader for as long as I can remember. I’ve read more books than I can count, but some stand out because I love them so much.

When I finally got my own library card, my parents gave me a big rolling backpack for Christmas, so that I could fit all my library books in one bag. The librarians smiled when they saw me coming with my 30+ books to check out. I’m a very fast reader, so I always had to check out lots of books to survive from one library trip to another. In the summer reading programs the library put on, I challenged myself to read a hundred books one year, one hundred twenty-five the next. Of course, this was before I had a job, so I had lots of time for reading.

When I was little, my mom read me the entire Little House on the Prairie series, as well as a series of missionary books. I still remember reading ahead in one of the missionary books and then feeling guilty when my mom realized what I’d done. She wasn’t disappointed that I’d disobeyed or lied to her; she was disappointed that I had read ahead without her, that I had created a dissonance in our reading time together.

My memories of books are often tied to what I was eating, or doing, or feeling when I read them for the first time. I remember reading the entire Jedi Apprentice series, consisting of about twenty 100-page books, on one long car ride down to Tennessee. I read a huge amount of Lurlene McDaniel books on Tennessee car rides, and later, dozens of Star Trek books on other Tennessee journeys.

The first time I read Eye of the World, the first Wheel of Time book, I was sitting in my car on my lunch break at work, eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I later read the rest of the series in my dorm room at school that fall, except for book four, which I read mostly during several days of a camping trip that August, and finished it at breakfast one day.

The Scarlet Pimpernel was on my list of classics to read, and I started it at a horse show one summer, but I was so tired that the words were swimming on the page in front of me, so I finished it in my car during a lunch break, over peanut butter and jelly sandwiches once again. I read a lot of books during lunch breaks. One book I did read at a horse show and stayed wide awake for was Matthew Stover’s novelization of The Revenge of the Sith, the third Star Wars movie.

I read Ender’s Game one summer day over lunch, and I meant to put it down and save the rest for that evening, as I was planning to go to the barn, but I could not stop until I had finished it. It was that intense. I remember reading Inheritance in bed one Saturday. I’d been waiting several years for that book, as it was the last in a series. I did not put it down until I had finished it, and that book is at least 700 pages long. (And utterly underwhelming.)

I love the books by Jim Kjelgaard: old style tales of dogs and men and other animals in the wild, fighting for their lives and relationships with each other. Jack London’s Call of the Wild and White Fang were also staples of my childhood, which I still adore. The book by Joanna Campbell, Battlecry Forever, still makes me cry at the end. To this day, The Black Stallion is one of my favorite books of all time, and I credit that book with fueling my childhood desire for a black stallion of my own.

National VelvetBlack Beauty, and the Phantom Stallion series fed my horse obsession. The Han Solo Trilogy fed my Star Wars obsession. The Warriors and Redwall series convinced me that animals are just like people, only with a different perspective. Julie of the Wolves and My Side of the Mountain made me fall in love with wolves and falcons, and now I have the (probably unhealthy) desire to be lost in the wilderness for a few months. Nancy Drew, however, did not interest me in being a detective.

My speed-reading abilities enable me to avoid putting a book down until I have finished it. I will confess that I have very carefully read books in the shower when I was so enamored that I could not bear to part from them for even a few minutes. So many of my nights have lasted far beyond my bedtime, and I’ve perfected the art of tucking a flashlight between my neck and the pillow as I stay awake for just one more chapter, only to discover that the book is finished and it’s three in the morning. I have avoided countless assignments by reading. When I was little, my mom had to search the bathroom every night to find the books I thought I had hidden, in order to prevent me from disappearing into the bathroom for hours on end.

My bookshelves are crammed, and I have become very creative in shelving them. If you stack the smaller ones this way and adjust this shelf to this height, you can fit three more in this space! It’s not easy to pull books off the shelves because they are jammed so tightly. I can never have too many books.

I have lived dozens of lives through books, explored this world and many others, and had my heart ripped out by fictional characters both animal and human.

I am a bibliophile and book addict. I’d never want to be anything else.

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Notes on Revelation

satan Passion of the Chrust

This semester, I am taking a class on the book of Revelation. It’s been a fascinating and illuminating journey as I learn the cultural context and the cultural meanings of all the visions and symbols in the book, and what John, the author, is trying to convey as his message (Inspired by God, of course).

We haven’t touched much on the futuristic aspect of Revelation and how much of it might be literal when it comes to the end times and all that. I’m not going to talk about that in this post, either.

But two particular discussions we had in the last few classes made me thoughtful.

We were talking about Revelation 12, the chapter in which John tells the story of the woman and the dragon and the story of Michael and the angels defeating the dragon, who is Satan. My professor took this opportunity to comment on Satan’s origins. Many people believe that Satan’s previous name was Lucifer, an angel, and God cast him out of heaven because a) he loved God too much and refused to bow down to humans as God’s ultimate creation, or b) that he became proud and wanted to be God’s equal.

Neither version is in the Bible, my professor said. The name Lucifer is not in the Bible. The story actually originates in a Jewish apocalypse, a book named 1 Enoch, which was written in the intertestamental period.

I confess: I had always thought that Satan used to be Lucifer and God cast him out of heaven, taking one-third of the angels with him. I don’t remember learning that at church or hearing it from anyone in particular, but now I’m rather embarassed about my ignorance.

My professor cited several Scripture references that lead people to believe this story, such as Revelation 12:9 (“And the great dragon was thrown down … to the earth, and his angels were thrown down with him.”), Isaiah 14:12-15, in which the title “Day Star” can be translated as Lucifer, and Luke 10:17-18, in which Jesus says he saw Satan fall from heaven.

Contextually, my professor said, Revelation is talking about ultimate spiritual defeat, not some event at the beginning of history. Isaiah is actually talking about the king of Babylon, not Satan, and Jesus is also talking about spiritual defeat, not a literal event.

Now, I’m no Biblical scholar. I don’t know ancient Hebrew or Greek, and I cannot claim to understand Revelation or any of the prophetic books very well at all, let alone everything Jesus said.

But my professor’s explanation of the Scripture references made sense to me, and I started wondering why the Jewish people would give Satan an origin story at all.

After all, he is evil incarnate, isn’t he? Why would anyone want to dwell on him more than necessary?

Well, this is what occurred to me.

1 Enoch was written in the intertestamental period, approximately (like I said, I’m not a Biblical scholar). This was a period in which God was silent. He was still present, still working in the lives of his people and the events of history, but he did not speak through prophets or judges or leaders.

This would have been a period of spiritual uncertainty for a people who were so accustomed to hearing the words of God spoken through his prophets, even if they didn’t like what they heard. History rolled onward in these four hundred years, often trampling God’s people. I’m sure they wanted an explanation for their suffering, just as Christians today ask “Why?”.

If Satan is evil incarnate, he was certainly present and working against God’s people during this period. The Bible does not tell us where the serpent in the Garden of Eden came from, just that he was there. Well, God created all things, so does that mean he created the serpent, Satan, too? That’s a disturbing thought.

The Jews must have thought so. Giving Satan an origin story in which evil was his choice, defying God was his choice, removes the blame of the creation of evil from God and puts it in the hands of free will, the same thing that humans have.

So if Satan never started off on God’s side, and has always been evil, does that mean he came from God?

That’s a terrible thought. The Jews didn’t like it either, I’m sure, thus the origin story.

I believe that God is omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient, and that he created everything. Better minds than mine have philosophized about the origin of evil and God’s role in that. I don’t have an answer; I just came up with a reason as to why anyone would give Satan an origin story.

The other discussion that sparked some thought for me was related to God’s incredible wrath and judgment described in Revelation. My professor has noted throughout the class that many scholars do not like Revelation and tend to try to explain it away or disregard it as part of Scripture because of the wrath. If God is love, than how can he also be so wrathful?

We are discussing the final chapters of Revelation, in which God brings justice and judgment to the wicked, those who belong to the “kingdom of the earth,” as John described them. My professor said that he sees wrath as necessary for justice. God’s people have been persecuted by the wicked, and now he is bringing justice to them by passing judgment on the wicked.

I think one reason people are so uncomfortable with the idea of God as a wrathful God, not only a God of love, is that that wrath has a target: the wicked. “But God loves everyone! He shouldn’t have wiped out Sodom and Gomorrah or the Canaanites!” people say. Well, he does love everyone. Often, his judgment is designed to bring people to repentance. But he cannot allow those who do not repent to avoid justice.

I think of it like this: Love is the beginning. Wrath is the ending.

God offers chance after chance for humanity to turn its back on evil and follow the Christ. He loves us more than we could ever imagine. But those chances are not unlimited. If humanity keeps its heart hard and refuses to accept Christ and persecutes God’s people, that does not go without consequences.

The inhabitants of the kingdom of the earth. In the context of the Bible, they are the ones who have not accepted Christ as Redeemer and Savior.

I think that those who are uncomfortable with the idea of God judging people and bringing his wrath down upon them feel that way because they don’t want to acknowledge that humans are sinful creatures; that they are sinful. God’s love is so much more attractive than his wrath because his love takes us as we are while his wrath demands repentance.

God brings judgment on those who deserve it, who have rejected him. People don’t like to think that anyone deserves judgment because that would mean admitting the sin and darkness that all humans are capable of.

God is just, however, and whether we like it or not, he will bring justice in the end times.

Remember, I’m no theologian or Bible scholar or philosopher. I’m sure people can find holes in my thought process here and pick apart my conclusions. But these two ideas needed to be written out, so that I could think them through.